Love that you're doing this Brooke. I've been starting to think we are 'un-evolving' as species over on social media! I've been looking for a way to engage meaningfully and keep community for a long time now and this looks like a great platform!
Curiosity is always a word that comes to mind when I have The Pang too. Allowing myself to be curious stems the self loathing somewhat!
Agreed! I have been wanting out of social media and the advertising bombardments for over a year now. I’ve not wanted to loose touch with the people I do respect and still want to hear meaningful content from, so I’ve hung in there. Great to see Brooke join the list of these people who are offering this other option for connection - I am one step closer to being Insta-free! Hurrah!
So glad to have you Jacqui! And I agree - it's tricky when we want to keep up with certain people and their content, but also want to break up with SM. Here's hoping this is a new way forward. xx
It's like you knew half a pumpkin arrived in my veggie box!
I feel those pangs, especially the friend pang.
The old four burners theory helped me with some of the guilt around this. The friends burner is definitely the back burner at this stage of my life. It is also for most of my friends.
Like you, I've had to train myself not to jump to telling myself I'm a bad friend/daughter/mother/human, but think about 1) the reasonableness of the expectations I'm putting on myself and 2) what's getting in the way of me being what I want at this moment. Sometimes, it's just that I'm a slacker when it comes to keeping touch with my mates. Looking at it this way at least motivates me to flick off a text to say hi, rather than just getting in a spiral in my head about how crap I am.
Oh friend, this resonated with me deeply. Every word of it. Thank you for writing it. It brings great comfort, knowing that someone else is feeling those same "pangs" of guilt and the weight of questioning our expectations of ourselves. I love your suggestion to get curious and be open to really examining what lies behind it all. I look forward to getting back to reading blogs- and perhaps doing a bit of writing as well.
I'm so glad to hear this Kim! I really think there is a deep desire for more honest, heartfelt connection (online and otherwise) but I also think many of us are struggling with The Pang. Looking forward to reading whatever you write xx
Thank you for The Tortoise, Brooke. I am a long time reader of your blog and was a bit upset when you moved onto podcasts. But I am glad you did, because you could interview many guests through that medium. I loved your slow post newsletter too and can't wait for it to resume. You have a beautiful way with words, and I am so happy you are back to blogging.
Oh my, Brooke this post has really resonated with me, yes- the pang! I feel it so much. I’ve even gotten very good at being compassionate with myself and pushing it away, not letting myself lose myself in the guilt and shame anymore. But to take it instead as an gentle invitation….now that is pure gold. Thank you so much for that nugget! I’ve only just subscribed but I love this blog/newsletter thing already, thank you for your efforts 🙏
Love that you're doing this Brooke. I've been starting to think we are 'un-evolving' as species over on social media! I've been looking for a way to engage meaningfully and keep community for a long time now and this looks like a great platform!
Curiosity is always a word that comes to mind when I have The Pang too. Allowing myself to be curious stems the self loathing somewhat!
I hear you, Katie! So far I'm super impressed with Substack and really excited to see what comes. Thank you so much for reading xx
Thanks for writing! I'm an OG blog reader and have learnt so much from you!
Agreed! I have been wanting out of social media and the advertising bombardments for over a year now. I’ve not wanted to loose touch with the people I do respect and still want to hear meaningful content from, so I’ve hung in there. Great to see Brooke join the list of these people who are offering this other option for connection - I am one step closer to being Insta-free! Hurrah!
So glad to have you Jacqui! And I agree - it's tricky when we want to keep up with certain people and their content, but also want to break up with SM. Here's hoping this is a new way forward. xx
Yay! So lovely to have your beautifully crafted words to read in this substack… as well as in your books.
Thank you so much, lovely Shireen! It's wonderful to see you over here. Can't wait to see what this space becomes xx
It's like you knew half a pumpkin arrived in my veggie box!
I feel those pangs, especially the friend pang.
The old four burners theory helped me with some of the guilt around this. The friends burner is definitely the back burner at this stage of my life. It is also for most of my friends.
Like you, I've had to train myself not to jump to telling myself I'm a bad friend/daughter/mother/human, but think about 1) the reasonableness of the expectations I'm putting on myself and 2) what's getting in the way of me being what I want at this moment. Sometimes, it's just that I'm a slacker when it comes to keeping touch with my mates. Looking at it this way at least motivates me to flick off a text to say hi, rather than just getting in a spiral in my head about how crap I am.
Oh I love this analogy, thank you!! And yes, def sometimes I'm just a slacker, and I'm teaching myself that that's okay too. xx
Loved reading this and looking forward to reading more!
So glad you enjoyed it. Thank you so much for being here! xx
Oh friend, this resonated with me deeply. Every word of it. Thank you for writing it. It brings great comfort, knowing that someone else is feeling those same "pangs" of guilt and the weight of questioning our expectations of ourselves. I love your suggestion to get curious and be open to really examining what lies behind it all. I look forward to getting back to reading blogs- and perhaps doing a bit of writing as well.
I'm so glad to hear this Kim! I really think there is a deep desire for more honest, heartfelt connection (online and otherwise) but I also think many of us are struggling with The Pang. Looking forward to reading whatever you write xx
Thank you for The Tortoise, Brooke. I am a long time reader of your blog and was a bit upset when you moved onto podcasts. But I am glad you did, because you could interview many guests through that medium. I loved your slow post newsletter too and can't wait for it to resume. You have a beautiful way with words, and I am so happy you are back to blogging.
Oh my, Brooke this post has really resonated with me, yes- the pang! I feel it so much. I’ve even gotten very good at being compassionate with myself and pushing it away, not letting myself lose myself in the guilt and shame anymore. But to take it instead as an gentle invitation….now that is pure gold. Thank you so much for that nugget! I’ve only just subscribed but I love this blog/newsletter thing already, thank you for your efforts 🙏
Fantastic! Thank you Brooke x