Thank you for sharing post when you are able to. As someone who had their hysterectomy yesterday, and is recovering in hospital, your posts have really helped me. I did have a long list of things to do before I went in but on reading one of your posts I laughed out loud and tore it up... I did change my bedding and towels so they are clean to go back to but the rest I have just left! Take care and I find it helpful to speak to myself as I would to a friend - I seem to be kinder to myself and more accepting that wayxx
The first came to me when my family was dealing with my father’s health challenges and I remember saying “this is where we are” and just leaning into all the difficulties and frustrations. Sometimes where we are sucks.
The second is Grace. May we all find Grace when faced with challenges, with ourselves and each other.
May you continue on your healing journey. That is what is most important. Content and being present with the internet is not.
I’m sorry to hear of your longer than hoped for recovery and the resurgence of your fatigue. As someone who has had long covid - not the same, but sharing similarities - I truly empathise with the frustration you’re expressing. I wish you healing every day.
I also want to take the chance to tell you something completely unrelated and hopefully positive. A year or two back on the podcast you asked people to send in questions for the next hostful. I was the random who asked you about getting a dog and sustainability. Well! Thank you for your advice. It took a while for all the stars to align but 5 weeks ago we brought home a very sweet labradoodle puppy. I’ve named her Rosie and she is a delight.
So many relateable points. This is rather blunt, but someone once told me 'your shit is your shit', it's simple, but I remind myself of this when things get hard, it's OK to feel your own stuff. Take care x
So sorry to hear it’s been so tough Brooke. Sending lots of love to you and your family. Thank you for sharing when you can. I meant to say after the last post when you mentioned it, as far as I am concerned, I didn’t think you needed to pause payments or subscriptions. You give and share so much of yourself, when you can, that is more than enough. You could treat it like paid sick leave you’d have in a job! Much love xxx
That comment (though said with the best intentions) ‘could be worse’ has lead me to musing on how inappropriate many of our phrases are when people are not well, are hurting, even during grief. There’s a hidden pressure behind ‘speedy recovery’ and ‘get well soon’ or ‘time of need’. Many of the generic cards in newsagents are so cringe worthy I shake my head thinking ‘that won’t do’ and end choosing a blank card (relaxing rainforest image with a sunbeam of light through the canopy) then writing my own comment. You’d think that, armed with the enormity and complexity of the English language, we’d have come up with more empathetic and appropriate selections to offer. With that said, I’m not sending you hope for a speedy recovery, I’m sending you insights to embrace the way you’re seeing life a bit differently. I’m already enjoying the quiet, repose of your words, which funnily enough, suits the still pace of the season. I couldn’t think of a better time to be recuperating than in Autumn. May the changing light, the antics of birds outside your window and a myriad other tiny things inspire you in a gloriously unhurried way. PS Give yourself permission to write a gardening to-do list and outsource this to friends and family who ask ‘is there anything I can do?’
Dear Brooke - thank you for this. Like everyone else I love your refreshing honesty and courage (and agree with you on the the 'cheer up' comment - aaargh!)
It struck me that a fallow time is just like a big tilt (read that carefully) and if something, or someone has had to tilt over a long way then it makes sense that it should take a decent length of time to tilt back up again.
Which is just a convoluted way of saying keep on taking all the time you need! xxx
Wishing you continued healing Brooke, and strength for that wiggly line upwards of recovery.
I feel like I want to connect this post and the podcast you did a while ago on mental load. As someone with a rare condition that was identified at birth and is lifelong, on the same very strict treatment I’ve been on for 40 or so years now and with no real new treatment on the horizon for around the next ten years, that podcast on mental load really resonated with me. The mental load of coping with a long term condition is often underestimated I think (and I would imagine more so if your condition remains undiagnosed). I look back on all that I did for myself throughout Uni and so on, and living somewhere like London (which I did until recently) and I keep having to think how important it is to recognise all that unacknowledged work/mental load which has taken a lot out of me to get me where I am today, and still takes a lot. I know I need periods of more support (I think I get treatment fatigue or burnout, something that I think is well-acknowledged with type 1 diabetes for example, but not necessarily for other conditions like my own). Which is all to say - I hope you will be gentle with yourself, which I know is easier said than done, and I think this is a really important area for more people to talk about openly, and thanks for sharing. Take care. ❤️ x
Hi Brooke, Thankyou for your emails. Rest to Reset by Suzy Reading has been an inspiring read for me and I thought you might like it. You’re doing a great job of recovering and hang in there ( I had a hysterectomy in 2013 and wish I’d been kinder to myself and dropped my expectations of myself) kind regards Genny
thank you for sharing this post with us - we genuinely care about you and hope you are being kind to yourself through this load road through recovery. Sending you lots of love from Chicago, IL!
What beautiful and helpful thoughts. 💕 I love your encouragement to accept and process the hard things while still looking for the good. Thank you so much for sharing the joys you’re finding in tough days. Wishing you well, Brooke!
Oh mate, you are so healing... this is the honesty that means you aren't faking it. Your cells know this. You are right where you need to be. Slowly, slowly it will come.
Sending you - and everyone here on this place - so much love,
Dear Brooke, What a frustrating and unexpected set of stuff to go through, I mean, “Really, Life?”*shaking a fist at the sky* Despite this extremely crappy run of events, your joy leaps off of the page. And you’re right- so many of us going through health conundrums. On the hard days it’s tough to remember one is not alone. Sending my best energy your way for corners to be turned and answers to be had. Your presence and words matter to this community, but only when the time is right. 💜
Thank you for sharing post when you are able to. As someone who had their hysterectomy yesterday, and is recovering in hospital, your posts have really helped me. I did have a long list of things to do before I went in but on reading one of your posts I laughed out loud and tore it up... I did change my bedding and towels so they are clean to go back to but the rest I have just left! Take care and I find it helpful to speak to myself as I would to a friend - I seem to be kinder to myself and more accepting that wayxx
Reading your post made me think two things.
The first came to me when my family was dealing with my father’s health challenges and I remember saying “this is where we are” and just leaning into all the difficulties and frustrations. Sometimes where we are sucks.
The second is Grace. May we all find Grace when faced with challenges, with ourselves and each other.
May you continue on your healing journey. That is what is most important. Content and being present with the internet is not.
All the best to you and your family.
Dearest Brooke,
I’m sorry to hear of your longer than hoped for recovery and the resurgence of your fatigue. As someone who has had long covid - not the same, but sharing similarities - I truly empathise with the frustration you’re expressing. I wish you healing every day.
I also want to take the chance to tell you something completely unrelated and hopefully positive. A year or two back on the podcast you asked people to send in questions for the next hostful. I was the random who asked you about getting a dog and sustainability. Well! Thank you for your advice. It took a while for all the stars to align but 5 weeks ago we brought home a very sweet labradoodle puppy. I’ve named her Rosie and she is a delight.
See you ‘round. 😊
So many relateable points. This is rather blunt, but someone once told me 'your shit is your shit', it's simple, but I remind myself of this when things get hard, it's OK to feel your own stuff. Take care x
Huge love to you, Brooke. ❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
I love the idea of this perhaps being a time of being fallow.
And may everyone on the planet stop telling people “it could be worse” 🙃
So sorry to hear it’s been so tough Brooke. Sending lots of love to you and your family. Thank you for sharing when you can. I meant to say after the last post when you mentioned it, as far as I am concerned, I didn’t think you needed to pause payments or subscriptions. You give and share so much of yourself, when you can, that is more than enough. You could treat it like paid sick leave you’d have in a job! Much love xxx
That comment (though said with the best intentions) ‘could be worse’ has lead me to musing on how inappropriate many of our phrases are when people are not well, are hurting, even during grief. There’s a hidden pressure behind ‘speedy recovery’ and ‘get well soon’ or ‘time of need’. Many of the generic cards in newsagents are so cringe worthy I shake my head thinking ‘that won’t do’ and end choosing a blank card (relaxing rainforest image with a sunbeam of light through the canopy) then writing my own comment. You’d think that, armed with the enormity and complexity of the English language, we’d have come up with more empathetic and appropriate selections to offer. With that said, I’m not sending you hope for a speedy recovery, I’m sending you insights to embrace the way you’re seeing life a bit differently. I’m already enjoying the quiet, repose of your words, which funnily enough, suits the still pace of the season. I couldn’t think of a better time to be recuperating than in Autumn. May the changing light, the antics of birds outside your window and a myriad other tiny things inspire you in a gloriously unhurried way. PS Give yourself permission to write a gardening to-do list and outsource this to friends and family who ask ‘is there anything I can do?’
Dear Brooke - thank you for this. Like everyone else I love your refreshing honesty and courage (and agree with you on the the 'cheer up' comment - aaargh!)
It struck me that a fallow time is just like a big tilt (read that carefully) and if something, or someone has had to tilt over a long way then it makes sense that it should take a decent length of time to tilt back up again.
Which is just a convoluted way of saying keep on taking all the time you need! xxx
Wishing you continued healing Brooke, and strength for that wiggly line upwards of recovery.
I feel like I want to connect this post and the podcast you did a while ago on mental load. As someone with a rare condition that was identified at birth and is lifelong, on the same very strict treatment I’ve been on for 40 or so years now and with no real new treatment on the horizon for around the next ten years, that podcast on mental load really resonated with me. The mental load of coping with a long term condition is often underestimated I think (and I would imagine more so if your condition remains undiagnosed). I look back on all that I did for myself throughout Uni and so on, and living somewhere like London (which I did until recently) and I keep having to think how important it is to recognise all that unacknowledged work/mental load which has taken a lot out of me to get me where I am today, and still takes a lot. I know I need periods of more support (I think I get treatment fatigue or burnout, something that I think is well-acknowledged with type 1 diabetes for example, but not necessarily for other conditions like my own). Which is all to say - I hope you will be gentle with yourself, which I know is easier said than done, and I think this is a really important area for more people to talk about openly, and thanks for sharing. Take care. ❤️ x
Hi Brooke, Thankyou for your emails. Rest to Reset by Suzy Reading has been an inspiring read for me and I thought you might like it. You’re doing a great job of recovering and hang in there ( I had a hysterectomy in 2013 and wish I’d been kinder to myself and dropped my expectations of myself) kind regards Genny
thank you for sharing this post with us - we genuinely care about you and hope you are being kind to yourself through this load road through recovery. Sending you lots of love from Chicago, IL!
What beautiful and helpful thoughts. 💕 I love your encouragement to accept and process the hard things while still looking for the good. Thank you so much for sharing the joys you’re finding in tough days. Wishing you well, Brooke!
Oh mate, you are so healing... this is the honesty that means you aren't faking it. Your cells know this. You are right where you need to be. Slowly, slowly it will come.
Sending you - and everyone here on this place - so much love,
Cherie
Brooke, your honesty, candour and appreciation of beauty in the moment are inspiring! Continue to recover gently X
"But the fact remains that it’s still hard, and in order to move through it, it needs to be acknowledged, accepted, and processed."
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Dear Brooke, What a frustrating and unexpected set of stuff to go through, I mean, “Really, Life?”*shaking a fist at the sky* Despite this extremely crappy run of events, your joy leaps off of the page. And you’re right- so many of us going through health conundrums. On the hard days it’s tough to remember one is not alone. Sending my best energy your way for corners to be turned and answers to be had. Your presence and words matter to this community, but only when the time is right. 💜