The Tortoise by Brooke McAlary
The Tortoise with Brooke McAlary
Soft life: Episode 13
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Soft life: Episode 13

Is a soft life simply the opposite of a hard one? If so, what does it look like?
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Welcome to Episode 13 of The Tortoise, the podcast (plodcast!) that digs deep into the possibilities of slow.

You can listen to the podcast right here, or if you’d prefer, subscribe via Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favourite pod-dealing platform.

If you’re new to The Tortoise — Welcome! Thank you for coming over! — you can sign up to the newsletter below to make sure you don’t miss an episode of the pod, and you’ll also receive a slow-living letter in your inbox every Thursday-ish.

The Topic: Soft life

If you spend any time on TikTok, you've probably seen the #softlife trend pop up over the past couple of years. Ben and I aren't on TikTok, so we’re late to the party (as usual) but wanted to dive into the sister movement of slow living anyway.

In today's episode, we look at what soft living is, where it began, how it relates to slow living, and why it seems to be following a similar trajectory as that of self-care, slow living, and other counter-cultural movements. (ie. becoming increasingly mainstream and commercial).

We also dig into:

  • soft living as opposed to hard living

  • our own definitions of a soft life (mine centres on joy, while Ben’s centres on asking for and accepting help)

  • the consumption and stuff attached to the social media version of soft living, and why that’s not the only way we can look at this movement

  • why well-intentioned movements are so often co-opted and dumbed down by the mainstream

  • why it’s not an extension of quiet-quitting, nor another way to avoid hard things

  • possible reasons why these kinds of movements (soft living, slow living, etc) appeal to women more than men and the role that a patriarchal society has on that

  • practical ways to carve out softness in our lives with boundaries (or anti-boundaries), rituals and being more mindful of the information we consume

This was a surprisingly enlightening conversation because it got both Ben and I thinking about why certain movements appeal to us differently, and what cultural and social factors make them either more or less accessible.

#softlife might look like a surface-level solution for the struggles of modern life, but once we strip it down to its core, it seems to speak more to the desire we all have to feel cared for.

We also talk briefly about plans for the future here at The Tortoise, and Ben wants to know if anyone who listens to the show would like to watch a video version instead.

If you’ve got a strong opinion on that one way or another, or if you’ve experimented with soft living and have made your own discoveries on what it is and isn’t, we’d love to hear.

Leave a comment

The Links

Below is a list of links discussed in today’s episode. If I’ve forgotten any, please let me know in the comments:


Thanks so much for tuning in. I’m on my usual school holidays writing break and will be back on deck early May. Until then, I hope you’re able to find little moments of softness in your day.

Brooke 💚💚

Discussion about this podcast

The Tortoise by Brooke McAlary
The Tortoise with Brooke McAlary
In a world made for hares, spend time feeding our inner tortoise. Welcome to The Tortoise - a podcast (plodcast!) that digs deep into the power of slow.