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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I’m Stephanie. I live in Dover, England and am married with a five month old son (who is the loveliest boy!). I first started listening to the slow home podcast years ago when I was particularly anxious and stressed and it opened a new world to me, the possibility of not living in such a stressful way. I’ve been on a journey since then to simplify and enjoy life and it’s going well. The values course I did with Brooke during Covid was also really helpful. I think for me there are two aspects to community. There’s one you can create, either online or in person, with like minded people that give you a sense of belonging. And there’s also a local aspect to community, that you don’t always get to choose and where people are not always like minded, but being a part of a local community of people living in close proximity, even if that’s all you have in common, is important to me. I think perhaps the first kind of community fills you up so you can take part in the second kind (which can often drain you!). Community is about give and take, there are aspects that should fill you up but also you need to give a part of yourself. I suppose a good community is where those balance out.

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Hi Stephanie! I've been thinking about your comment all weekend and just wanted to say thank you for writing it. I had always found myself torn between the two types of community you explained, never quite understanding why I found myself drained by the stereotypical 'community' actions like volunteering, living close to lots of different people, etc. It's because I put all types of community effort into the one basket, when I think you're 100% right - there's two different baskets. I think this is going to have a huge impact on how I move forward through this, so thank you!

It's also lovely to get to know a little of your story after spending a bit of time together during the slow retreat. That seems like both a lifetime and a week ago! 💚

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May 1, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Thank you, lovely to hear from you! I only started thinking about it when you posed the question about community and realised I actually think there’s more than one type, that that’s ok, and that perhaps they’re both needed. A bit like any relationships or activities I suppose, ensuring you have some that fill you so that you’re able to have something to give to those that don’t always fill but can be valuable for other reasons

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Brooke (and everyone else here)! I started listening to the Slow Home Podcast a couple of years ago and am really enjoying and fully supportive of the evolution into the Tortoise - I wish there was more of your honesty, Brooke, in online (and offline) spaces. I think the world could do with more of it! My husband and I have been proponents of slow living (though we didn't have a name for it) since forever, but it's always been a messy, hit-and-miss kind of slow - baking bread, great. Lots of commuting, not so much. Everything changed when our eldest daughter arrived nearly 8 years ago. A hugely demanding baby, she wasn't going to allow for us to slowly evolve into parents - she needed us to be parenting at 150% and she needed it yesterday. Cue postnatal depression for me and stress/anxiety for my husband, both highly-sensitive people (actually, Brooke, I have you to thank for mentioning highly sensitive people on your podcast, otherwise we'd never have known!). Now with two children, slow looks like self-directed home education (on the other side of a demand-avoidant autism diagnosis for my 7yo and a highly sensitive 5yo), dog walks, and home made bread (still. Mostly). But it's still messy and since self-care often comes second to just getting through the day (it should never come second. And yet.) burnout is never far away. So I often find myself returning to Slow, and Care, and the Slow Home archives just to remind myself that there is sanity somewhere in the world, even if it isn't in my small world at that exact moment. Thanks for the lifeline!

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Hello Jane! So so lovely to have you here, and so wonderful to learn some of your story too. There's so much evolving happening all the time, isn't there? I love how you describe life and slowness - how it's messy and hard and there's rarely enough hours. I 100% agree. I think as long as we have a decent handle on our why, the how is going to look different day to day. Trying to make peace with that at the moment myself! 💚💚

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So lovely to hear your story Jane, real and honest. ❤️

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Jane, I too have Brooke to thank for my HSP discovery! It was on her podcast when she spoke about Elaine Aron and it has been a life saving, game changer for me. It does sound like you have your hands full but doing an incredible job. My daughter is also HS but because I didn't understand this trait I have a lot of regrets and she struggled a lot with poor mental health in her teens. Having the knowledge that you do, while your children are so young, is a wonderful gift. xx

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I've got the wonderful Cait Flanders to thank for Elaine Aron! She mentioned her work a few years ago and changed the game for me too. x

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Apr 30, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Thank you so much! I hope you and your daughter both manage to do lots of healing 💕

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Brooke - I’m Kelly, 57 years old, live in Colorado USA. I’ve been reading about slow living since forever, and have followed you for a long time. Unfortunately I did not put my reading into action - I think I mainly used the readings as a form of temporary tourism into another life that didn’t seem possible for me. Over time I developed a chronic illness, and now I am on the verge of taking early retirement to see what happens when I put my health first! I also did not prioritize friends or community during my decades of stress, and am wondering how to rebuild in those areas. I think to me community means a group of people who support one another and value both each other and the larger sense of belonging and purpose. Looking forward to journeying with everyone!

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Kelly, this hit me right between the eyes "I did not put my reading into action - I think I mainly used the readings as a form of temporary tourism into another life that didn’t seem possible for me." I've been there so many times! I call it Inspiration Procrastination 😆

And thank you for sharing your struggles with health, community and friendship too. I can tell you you're definitely not alone in any of that. I think there's a lot of us looking for ways to rebuild better. I can't wait to see how it plays out for all of us. So glad to have you here 💚

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I’m Susan, I came across you by accident Brooke, I was bored waiting for my husband at his office whilst he finished his meeting. They had a stack of books from one of those book selling schemes and I was drawn to your book Slow because of the beautiful bark ringed cover, fortuitous because I’m a bit scared of the internet. Bored no longer I couldn’t put it down, you were saying so many things that I was feeling. You have always had a way of expressing how many are feeling in the times that we are living through. You have given me so much food for thought Brooke that I am continually grateful for. Thank you 🙏💚.

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This is such a wonderful story Susan - thank you for sharing it! I always love hearing how connections happen, there's some kind of everyday magic in it. So grateful that you picked that book up, and so grateful to have you here. 💚

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Brooke, I'm Candice, I'm 36, childfree and I've been listening to the podcast almost right from the start. Back then I was in a hectic sales career in Melbourne and very much doing the Joneses thing. Over the years I've quit sales and the corporate world, moved to Port Douglas, started working behind a bar and my partner and I are working towards buying some random cabin in the rainforest or woods (we can't decide between Far North Queensland and Tasmania as our preferred location). Right now my favourite book is The Art of Frugal Hedonism, which I re-read after listening back to your pogpast episode. Community to me, living in such a small tourism/hospo town is just letting go of all the old big city ways of doing things and embracing bumping into people I know wherever I go 😄

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Hi Candice! So so glad to meet you, and so honoured to know you've been with us since the beginning. (What a ride!) Sounds like you're in such a place of curiosity and "what might happen if..." which is awesome and liberating and maybe a little bit scary too. My favourite mode to be in.

Oh I LOVE Annie's book. I'm so glad you've rediscovered it. I have such fond memories of talkingto her in a library in Melbourne a few years ago. You know how some people just sparkle? She's like that.

And I hear you on small tourist town life too. It's taken us a few years to really settle in to the vibe of always seeing people when we pop in for a coffee/to buy some fruit etc. Now I just allow extra time for it all 😆

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I hadn’t heard of the Art of frugal hedonism but I’m intrigued. I’ve just reserved a copy from the library, thanks for the idea :)

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Apr 30, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I hope you like it! I really like the sense of humour the authors have and how fun they make the whole approach

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It’s a great read Sophie, so many fab ideas to have fun and not spend too much cash. It was my first book club recommendation and I hosted our book club session at home where everyone bought some food to share. It was one of Annie’s recommendations. It worked so well and we run book club this way 5 years later! The ladies love it as it makes hosting easier AND less expensive!

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May 1, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Sounds great- I’m looking forward to it. Was excited when I saw the library had it- there’s my first frugal win! 😁

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Apr 27, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Thanks for sharing Brooke. I am 40, married with two kids (ages 5 and 2), and have also been interested in minimalism and intentional living for about a decade. Last year I feel like we took some concrete steps to simplify our life- we moved from Sydney to a small hinterland town on the Sunshine Coast and now live on an acre of rainforest style gardens, which I try to spend time outside in every day, noticing the changes and the birds and animals who also share this home with us.

For me, the best communities I’ve found have been on blogs where the author and commentators end up in supportive discussions, so I like this style of community you are creating here :) I’ve also enjoyed workshops (attending Oliver Burkemans recently and it was great). I’m looking to subscribe to your paid option soon and further support your work.

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So nice to get to know a bit more about you, Sophie. It sounds like you're in such a great space (literally and figuratively!) An acre of rainforest garden sounds like BLISS. And I agree RE positive online communities. I love seeing people connecting and supporting each other. It takes time to cultivate sometimes, but it's always worth it I think.

The Oliver Burkeman workshop sounds super interesting - did he dig into the topics from his book?

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Yes, building on 4000 weeks concepts and putting them into action- one on “The Art of Imperfect Action” and one on “Designing your process for creativity”. They were both really good.

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They sound fantastic - thank you for the heads up!

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Love Oliver Burkeman's work!

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Thank you for sharing your story Brooke and how wonderful it is to read those of everyone else!

I'm Carolyn, aged 51 and living in the Adelaide Hills. I emigrated to Australia from Scotland 18 years ago with my husband, 2 children and mum and dad!! My values are home, simplicity, solitude, growth and nature.

I have been a Registered Nurse for over 30 years and after a couple of episodes of burnout I found myself unable to go. So, at the start of 2021 I finally resigned from my paid job. I was planning to take maybe 6 months to a year off, but 2 years later I still haven't made it back, and just last week I gave up my nursing registration! However, my life has never felt better or more in alignment with my values. After discovering Brooke and the slow living movement around 8 years ago I would dip in and out, wishing that I could 'have that life' or saying 'I will have that life when..'. Now, instead of striving to 'create' that life I feel able to let it evolve naturally. I've had to do a lot of head work!!

My simple / slow living journey has been long and weaving, but now that I am older I can look back with so much more insight. I realise that the yearning to live simply and slowly was ALWAYS there. It is who I am. When I think back to childhood, I loved being in nature, I loved being alone, I loved reading. I loved living life slowly. When I look back at the moments that have brought me most joy in life it has been the family filled days, gardening, making, cooking and snuggling up with my babies. In striving to keep up with everyone else and what I thought was expected of me I denied myself a lot of peace and happiness along the way. So, don't be like me! Figure it out early :-)

Community for me is my family, friends, local community and special places like here, where like-minded souls can gather, feel safe, nurtured, encouraged, heard and supported. I volunteer in the local library and for a nature restoration action group. I am passionate about encouraging others to slow down, live more simply and reconnect to nature. I want to be a positive example. I really strongly believe we (humans) are not meant to live the way that we do and that simple slow living can offer the purpose and meaning that many of us are yearning for.

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I couldn't love this more, Carolyn! Thank you so much for sharing. I especially resonate with this: "Now, instead of striving to 'create' that life I feel able to let it evolve naturally. I've had to do a lot of head work!!" I wish I had known that 10 years ago. I think the head work is the biggest part for me still. Just the learning and forgetting and relearning. I don't fight it anymore - it is what it is - but I think knowing that is so helpful on the days it feels like I've gone backwards.

It's so so lovely to have you here and genuinely wonderful to meet you 💚💚

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May 1, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Amazing! Caroline, I love everything you’ve written here... especially days filled with gardening, family, snuggling and making it all sounds just right!

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Brooke. I am Kristen an almost 48 year old living in the Gatineau Hills, Quebec, Canada, close to Ottawa. I live in the country with my husband and our 2 senior dogs Hailey and Zaphod. I have an intense job working with individuals with autism and related disorders. I love it but it can be depleting. I am an introvert who hates large groups and sees community as connecting with small groups of people with shared values, goals, experiences. I enjoy travel and reading and quiet. I value self-care and growth so am always looking at ways to shift my life for the better. I can’t even remember how I found you but I believe it was in the single digits of the slow home podcast and have been taking inspiration from you since then. Thanks for all you do!

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It's so awesome to have you here Kristen, and since the early days of the original pod too! You're an OG 💚 I hear you on the care-focused work as an introvert, and can only imagine how demanding/rewarding your work must be. It sounds like you have a really excellent understanding of yourself and what you need in order to feel supported though, which is brilliant. That takes work! Thanks again for being here. xxx

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

This is super sweet. I’ve enjoyed your writing a lot lately! I love writing and reading. My current season has both been breaking my heart and renewing my sense of strength and courage. I’ve had a very challenging high risk pregnancy for my baby in utero who has several genetic issues going on (made it to 36 weeks!), and I’m realizing you can both love a child more than you know and feel the grief of things being very stressful and intense (each week is like holding our breath and trying to slowly release it). I appreciate your simple and slow living approach . I appreciate what you said about liking your life right now even though that was not always the case. Being so pregnant, I have so many emotions all the time, and it’s nice to remember that it’s okay to feel it all. Thanks for sharing yourself and making space for others. If you ever want a peek at my current journey, you can join me at my blog :).

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Julie, it's so lovely to meet you and to hear a little of your story. I can only imagine the challenges you're facing right now - the tension of many opposing things being true at the same time can be really tough to navigate. Add pregnancy emotions into the mix and man! That's a lot. Thinking of you and your little one - I hope the next few weeks are as simple and straightforward as they can be 💚💚💚

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May 1, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Julie, your story resonates with me so deeply. High risk pregnancies are so challenging for your heart and your head. Sending ❤️

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Apr 28, 2023·edited Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I also discovered your work only recently when I discovered the podcast on Spotify. The first thing that probably caught my eye was the picture of the turtle haha. We have a friend whose nick name is turtle, so I was naturally intrigued what kind of turtle would be behind The Tortoise? Turns out an amazing and interesting one!

Thank you for your introduction today. I can relate to a lot of things having experienced a mental and physical burnout starting at 26, darkest time at 28, and took me until my 30th birthday to get out of it, quite a journey (I'm 43 now). My body has developed a warning system to let me know now when it's all getting too much - which doesn't hold me back from happily overwhelming myself with a wide array of passions and activities (flakey! curious as hell)... but I've never been back to where I was at the time. And to be honest, I'm still learning how to take proper care of myself and nourish myself as I tend to neglect that.

I moved to Australia more than 5 years ago and I'm passionate about regeneration, permaculture, gardening, resilience, futuresteading, ecosystem restoration, and definitely slow living. I'm doing artistic things too like little illustrations. I like yoga, Ayurveda and preparing healthy meals but I'm not doing enough of that. Like you I know deep down that community is crucial...for everything. Living a life of many changes due to a family situation I haven't been able to become part of a local community the way I would like to but I'm working on it right now. Intuition seems to lead me to a lot of pathways and get me there, step by step and slow.

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So so lovely to have you here Do! Thank you for taking the time to introduce yourself - I love getting to know a bit about the people behind the names. Also! This resonates so much with me "My body has developed a warning system to let me know now when it's all getting too much - which doesn't hold me back from happily overwhelming myself with a wide array of passions and activities (flakey! curious as hell)" It's keeping that wobbly kind of balance between our curious natures and caring for our sensitive hearts, isn't it?

I also hear you on the slow process of finding community. All I can say is that every little effort adds up. Keep at it. And thank you for being here 💚💚

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I’m Julie, 53 year old wife and mother of three adult sons. Executive Director of a large organization in Omaha, Nebraska, USA. Empty nesting has been such deep waters for me, emotionally, and I’m trying to figure out what life looks like now. Thinking about a career change and am working on slowing down. You’ve helped me so much, Brooke. Love your writing and your podcast. Thank you.

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Hi Julie! I can only imagine the empty nest feelings! Knowing what I know about myself, I can see big life changes when we hit that era too. What they will look like is anyone's guess though 😆 Thank you for sharing a bit of your story and for being here. I appreciate it so much xx

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Apr 27, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Brooke,

I only recently discovered your podcast and have been really enjoying your conversations and insights into life. Parenting 4 spirited boys, my hubby and I have been working on slowing down, simple living and being happy exactly as we are right now. My definition of simple living is 'sitting down in the mess and having a cup of tea!'.

We live in a small country town in SA and our kids can run wild, bike riding with their friends, roaming, yabbying down the creek. The people who live here all look out for each other and this is what community is to us. A safe place where people look after each other and the kids are safe to have independence and just be kids! I think it's also important to mention 'service' when it comes to community. Volunteering and pitching in is so important and easy to skim over when you are trying to live a slower life. We are mindful with our commitments so as not to over do it but find that throwing ourselves into the local sports and school groups gives us such a great sense of community. Our kids notice too and I think they feel a greater sense of connection to community because we do all these things.

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It's so lovely to have you here Sophie, and I couldn't love your definition of simple living more. I'm getting better at allowing myself to do just that, and am constantly reminded that the mess will wait.

I really love your definition of community too, and agree so much with including service. I often find it tricky to balance my desire to contribute with my need for slowness, and think there's a really interesting conversation to be had about that. (Maybe a pod episode??) But YES to finding a sense of belonging that way. We've found that to be the case in our newish home town, for sure. 💚💚

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I'm Gillian. Part time accountant, full time mother to 3 small girls. I live in Calgary, Canada an easy 40 min drive from the Rocky mountains where we spend so many weekends. I found your work and podcast after I had my first baby, six years ago next week. I read Essentialism while working a terrible corporate job which really rocked my perspective - I can achieve goals without striving?!? I don't have to strive for worthiness? I quit that job, started my own tiny accounting practice and then with little income became a minimalist, I questioned every purchase out of necessity and really loved having less, less to manage, less to do. Then I had twins and everything stopped, carrying 2 babies was so hard, I was in constant pain and was so big that even sleeping was hard at the end. Now 3 years out from that pregnancy and with several years of therapy under my belt I am delving back into what makes me happy. I've been trying to break up with my phone since I had the twins (so many hours reading terrible stories on reddit during that year because it was the only thing I could do). So I looked up your book while at the library which then lead me to your newsletter. I'm glad to have your voice in my life again.

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Gilli, you live in hands-down my *favourite* part of the world. We've spent many months of joy in the Rockies and surrounds over the years (Ben and I were lifties at Sunshine about 20 years ago 😬) So wonderful to have you here, and I'm so glad you shared some of your story. Those lightbulb moments ("I can achieve goals without striving?!? I don't have to strive for worthiness?") are so crucial, and hearing about others' can be the key we need to unlock our own journey. Thank you for sharing yours, and here's to taking time to find ourselves again. Much love to you 💚💚

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hello, Brooke! I’m Weronika from Poland, living in Canada. I’m 34, child free by choice, pet free by necessity. Until recently I had been working as a wildfire firefighter but after some health issues and burn out my husband and I quit fire and moved to the Sunshine Coast, BC. Now I work part time as a cook and very part time as a birth doula and love it. I’ve been listening to your podcast since 2016, love it and really enjoy it’s new format. I’ve been interested in slow living for several years and, similarly to you, had gone through multiple phases: minimalism, everything natural and homemade, zero waste… I’ve landed on something that’s the most sustainable for my family and doesn’t feel like another item on the to-do list.

I’m currently re-reading the Dresden Files and enjoying it immensely. I also really liked “The Firekeeper’s Daughter”.

Thank you for your podcast and emails, and your wonderful books! Take care!

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May 1, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Weronika,

Sound like you have made a really positive choice! I too have been along the minimalism, natural, homemade path and finally found a combo that is realistic and comfortable for my people. Being a birth doula would be amazing 🤩

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Hi Weronika! It's so lovely to meet you - I think you might live in one of the loveliest parts of the world! And I love hearing about your own journey through the different types of slow living too. I think it takes time to work out what it looks like personally, as well as what's sustainable personally, and there's a real sense of ease that comes when we land on it (at least for a while). I'm so glad to have you here, and thank you for reminding me about The Dresden Files! I've never read the series but have added them to my list. 💚💚

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

Hi Brooke,

Im Joanna. Im a New Yorker but not NYC. I grow up on Long Island and relocated to Rochester NY. I am a mother to 3 boys ages 19, 15, 13. Yes 3 teen boys. Im a school teacher working with students that speak English as tgeir second language. I love language and cultures etc.

I found you Brooke when you wrote for Tsh Oxenreider and I connected with your writing , then your podcasts and your newsletter.

I seek a slow pace of life. Mostly as my children entered school and I felt they "had to keep up". They are great kids but not advanced academically. I always feel like we are keeping our head above water academically. Thst is BC there is one expected parh- which I dont believe in. So I feel a bit rebellious always looking to take the alternate path.

Thank you Brooke for your insights. I love each phase you ( and Ben) have been through.

P.S recently I was telling a friend about you and I said " my friend from Australia" . how funny as I have never met you. 🤣

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Hi Joanna! So wonderful to meet you, and so so cool that you've been with me since I wrote for Tsh! I have so many fond memories of that time in my life, Tsh gave me a boost in confidence that I may not otherwise have had. And I hear you on the pressure to stick to the academic path. When our (then) 13 year old came home and told us that teachers were saying she had to get good marks in Year 7 otherwise she wouldn't get a good job, I was a bit gobsmacked and really sad. There are so many ways to carve out a place in the world as an adult, and to put that kind of pressure on kids for whom life is so much more overwhelming than it was when we were growing up...it bothers me. I'm so glad your boys have you on their side. I know you know this already, but they're going to be great.

Much love, Brooke (your friend in Australia) 💚💚

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Apr 29, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

That is funny Joanna but I think we all see Brooke as our 'friend' :-)

Just had to say that I totally agree 100% with your comments on education. We put young people in a box and expect them all to learn the same way (however adaptable we think our education system is). I think a lot of young people fall through the gaps purely because they struggle to put words on paper or answer exam questions. University is the same thing. So good on you for embracing the alternative!

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Yes yes yes 100% Carolyn!!

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Apr 28, 2023Liked by Brooke McAlary

I’m Johanna I am 52 married for 30 years to my bestest friend, have raised two boys into kind men and accept my family is not quite complete without a dog “being”sharing the journey.

I live in Victoria Geelong on Wadawurrung Country

Having lived with a post viral infection for over 20years my life has been filled with many challenges though to use your words Brooke they have left behind layers of lessons that support heartminded wellness - simple, slow, space so I can pay attention and be intentional

Love your question re community serendipitously something I have been pondering 🤔 so like you not a fully formed idea

A space I feel seen, heard, accepted where I can be me and be received with kindess and truth, where heartminded ( Sarah Blondin) curiosity resides

Look forward to exploring further with the community you are unfurling

Kindest💞

Joh

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So lovely to meet you Johanna! And I hope you're finding pockets of time for healing and rest - post viral infection no joke and such a challenge to learn to live with and navigate around as best we can.

I love your thoughts on community, particularly the phrase 'heartminded curiosity'. I haven't heard it before but really love it. Here's hoping together we can create something worthy of it here.

Thanks for being part of it! 💚💚

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