Today I want to dig into a few things that might help make you feel good over the weekend, for no reason other than I think we’re all in need of a little feel-good moment right now. So please accept this dahlia I grew, and read on for some nice things to try this weekend.
Practise diaphragmatic breathing
Every night, before I go to sleep, and every morning when I meditate, I’ve been practising diaphragmatic breathing. That is, deep, belly breathing that focuses on filling the lungs completely when inhaling, and then exhaling very slowly until the lungs are empty and the diaphragm contracted.
I first did it because my accupuncturist suggested it, but this practise has since become a really important part of my daily rhythms.
I’ve got an entire post in the works about how we can slow our breath and why we would want to, but for now just know that taking a few minutes every day and focusing on deep, intentional breath - specifically with a long inhale and an ever longer exhale - has massive benefits, both immediate and long-term.
In short, it shifts our nervous system away from the ‘fight or flight’ mode, and puts us into ‘rest and digest’ mode, where our heart rate, blood pressure and inflammatory responses reduce. Most importantly though (and probably most relevant at the moment, for many of us) is the way it helps reduce our stress levels.
This brief Insight Timer guided meditation from Leah Sugerman (Insight is my favourite meditation app) is a really good 6-minute introduction into diaphragmatic breathing specifically for stress relief. If you’re looking for a moment of respite this weekend, maybe you could try it and see how you feel after?
Play Twenty Questions with someone you love.
Asking questions and listening - really listening - to the answers is a powerful way to build intimacy in our relationships and to connect to another human in a way that’s good for both you and them.
And truly, this kind of connection is so good for us. Among other things, it strengthens our immune system, improve our cardiovascular health and increases our sense of empathy, self-confidence, co-operation and trust.
Try asking:
What’s your love language?
If you could eat one cuisine for the rest of your life, what would it be?
What do you think happens when we die?
Do you believe in aliens?
What about ghosts?
What’s your earliest childhood memory?
If you could time travel, where and when would you go?
Imagine there’s a zombie apocalypse. What’s your survival plan? (You might want to listen to this ridiculously silly and fun episode of The Slow Home Podcast for ideas.)
Make Future You a meal.
When you’re next cooking dinner, see if you can make double and freeze half.
I can’t tell you how grateful I am to Past Brooke when I’m having One of Those Days and then remember she popped a pasta bake in the freezer a few weeks ago. Or a batch of soup. Or a weird bean-casserole-thing that she made up one rainy Sunday afternoon. (This ribolitta is delicious too and the closest recipe I could find.)
It’s like a gift from your wise, kind Past Self.
Look for tiny ways to spread kindness
Here’s the thing about kindness: it’s good for you and it’s good to do.
It’s a perfect positive feedback loop of doing good = feeling good = other people feeling good = doing good… and so on. If you’re in need of a pick-me-up (and ironically, helping others does act as a personal pick-me-up - in fact, I think it’s one of the most powerful kinds) you might want to try one of these tiny random acts of kindness:
Leave a positive review for a favourite restaurant, bar, store or service you appreciate
Give a courtesy wave to the car that lets you in front in traffic
Pick up three pieces of rubbish on your walk
Hold the door open for someone
Refill the ice-cube trays
Make a loved one a cup of tea
Wave to your neighbour
Write a letter to a friend and mail it to them
Put on your favourite song and dance it all out
There’s something truly freeing about putting on a good song and dancing out your feelings. I often find myself doing it in the kitchen of a morning, but have also been known to include a decent amount of interpretive dance into my bathroom cleaning efforts.
I have a preference for truly awful nineties dance music in this instance (Here’s Johnny by Hocus Pocus is a terrible, embarrassing favourite of mine, much to the disgust of my family) but have also been known to lose my mind to some Lizzo, Beastie Boys and Fatboy Slim. I actually made a playlist if you’re interested.
Regardless of what you think of my musical taste though, I challenge you to find that one song you can’t not dance to, and put it on sometime this weekend. Then, just cut a rug. See how you feel.
Here’s to you and here’s to tiny moments of nice things this weekend. Thanks again for being part of the first week of The Tortoise. You’re actually the best.
Brooke xx
On the podcast this week:
The end of Season 9 is upon us, so Ben and I dig into the first few months of 2022. And honestly, it’s been a lot. Let’s discuss, shall we?
I’m currently:
Watching: Bad Vegan on Netflix
Reading: Book 3 of the Obernewtyn Chronicles
Hoping: to plant some garlic soon but Diggers has sold out (if you know where I can order some online, help a sister out!)
Working: on a picture-book manuscript and realising that telling an entire story in only a few hundred words is no joke.
Listening: to the Harry Potter and the Cursed Child soundtrack
Finally:
If you enjoy The Tortoise, please feel free to share it. It’s one way you can support me and my work and I will bestow you with many good wishes and the honorary title of Big-Time Tortoise Pal.
Lovely to see you back!
Can’t believe we’re at April already
🥴😵💫
Curious as to why you’ve chosen this as your platform rather than your website?
It’s great to read you tho!
x 🌿💚
My "one song" is Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man. Love it.
And totally agree that doing something good for someone else makes you feel so much better inside